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Summary: Interviews with young people attending the 2011 Day of General Discussion on Children with Incarcerated Parents.
Raheel, 17, from the UK, was 16 when his dad was arrested. His dad is now serving a seven-year sentence for fraud. Raheel came to the UN Committee on the Rights of the Child's Day of General Discussion on children of incarcerated parents in Geneva to share his experiences. I was at college when my dad was arrested, but by the time I found out my dad had already been released on bail which meant he was able to tell me himself what had happened. He was on bail for two years before he was sent to prison, so I had time to get used to the idea and talk it through with him. When he was sentenced, he was sent to a category A prison called HMPS Manchester (Strangeways). My experience of Strangeways was kind of uncomfortable; there were a lot of security checks and restrictions because category A prisons have the highest security. Because of this, there was a lot of talk among my family – cousins, etc. about what this means, but I wasn't involved directly in the discusssions so I was just picking up bits and pieces of information. When I went to visit, no one told me anything – I just had to follow the signs. The process for getting a visiting order is also really complicated. The way it works is that my dad has to fill out the order and submit it to get permission for the visit. Only the people who are named in the visiting order are allowed access. After that, I have to fill out more forms online and ring the prison each time to arrange a time to visit. I do this for my whole family as the eldest son and because my mum isn't so familiar with technology. But there's quite a lot of pressure as if you make a spelling mistake or anything, you might not be allowed in. My dad has now been transferred to a category c/d prison where he can have five or six visits a month. Before, at Strangeways, he was only allowed four. It's hard to find out what's going on sometimes as we are not informed when he is transferred or what the new system will be. We have to wait for my dad to get settled in and get the money to call us so he can tell us what is happening. My college was really supportive. I told my form tutor what was going on as I had to get time off for visits and things. My friends were good about it too; no one prejudged me or anything. I found out about the COPING Project which supports children with parents in prison through POPs [Partners of Prisoners and Families Support Group]. They had information at the prison explaining how I could give my ideas online about how things should change. The COPING Project asked me if I wanted to come to Geneva to talk to people about my experiences. I came because I wanted to tell people what things are like first-hand instead of professionals telling our stories for us. Sian, 13, from the United Kingdom, was invited to share her experiences at the Day of General Discussion by Partners of Prisoners and Families Support Group (POPS). I was with my dad when he was arrested so it was quite a shock. We were living in Spain at the time. We were working when it happened: it was the summer holidays and I'm really close to my dad so I was helping him out at work. I was just eight years old. Luckily my sister's ex-boyfriend was also with us so he looked after me when dad was taken away. He was only 17 himself, but some people don't have anyone they know around when something like this happens. It was a wrench as we literally had to pack up our stuff and leave the country to come back to the UK within six days. I had to start a new school and make friends all over again. We stayed with my cousins at first though which made things easier as there were lots of friendly faces around. My sister had enrolled in a university in the UK, so she had her flight booked before dad was arrested anyway. I used this as an excuse to tell everyone about why I had come back. Some of my friends know now but I didn't tell people until I got to know them better. I don't think any of my teachers knew what had happened until I told my form tutor when I reached high school. I don't think he remembered though as I had to explain again when I asked for time off to come to Geneva this week! I don't know much about what support is out there for children who have a parent in prison to be honest because I don't feel like I needed it. That's just my personal situation because I have a very close family. We all talked things through together, and my sister and I are really close. There are lots of other children out there who don't have any support.